Category Archives: Workshops

Communication with Teenagers

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Communication with Teenagers 

You may have been used to having a child whom you have often needed to tell or
ideally show what to do, but now you have a teenager who needs to learn to be an adult.
They still need guidelines so that they know where they stand, and help with some
things too, but you can let them know that there are times when they can really help
you as well.

You could include them in discussions as if they were another adult about the place,
asking their views about family and other things.  You might be surprised at their
insight, but you will need to be prepared to accept their honesty!

They need to learn how to deal with practical household things, and financial details
too, so if there are decisions that need to be made about how to handle bills, or set up,
fix, or replace something, do include them in that too.  One day when they move out,
they will need to have an understanding of these things if they are going to be successful
at living independently.  Of course they should help with the chores and DIY, but be
careful not to turn this into a battle, and make allowance for their busy study schedules etc.
It needs to be about willingly showing a little responsibility rather than doing things under
duress. You should make sure they understand that everyone has bits to do so that they
can see the fairness of it, and it might be an idea to change things around a bit every now
and again, for example offering them a choice of what they might like to get some practice
at this month or next.  Try to gently teach them what they want to know, for example they
might like to make a meal for their friends, or for Dad’s birthday perhaps, or help make
sandwiches for your party (and be allowed to stay up a bit late to offer them around the
guests). Even adults need to be praised for the positives instead of always criticised, so
remember to notice if they do something particularly well or think of something for
themselves.

If there are changes of job or working hours, or moves to be made, including your teenagers
in discussions helps them to understand your viewpoints and reasoning, a) so that they won’t
get the wrong end of the stick, and b) so that they won’t feel hurt or rejected or angry with one
or other or both of you.  You can see how there could be a danger they might misunderstand
things if they were not included in discussion; for example they might make assumptions that
Dad made Mum suddenly go out to work when they were used to having her at home, when
really it might have been Mum who wanted to get into doing something.  Or they might
presume that Dad was sacked when really he decided to give up a job to become self
employed, or to have a break for health reasons.  It’s also obviously important to try to
give them an unbiased view of things, not a one-sided account from one parent or the
other, as that tends to manipulate their feelings and loyalties unfairly.

Even if there are family difficulties, it is far better to share what is going on.  It’s
unrealistic to try to shield your teenager too much from the realities, whether the
issues are at home or in the big bad world out there.  If you shield them too much
then they may get some very nasty surprises later, and possibly struggle to cope if it
is all too sudden.

Reasoning with someone you have helped to mature is the best way to come to
agreements about where they should be allowed to go and what time they will be
expected home, and what to do if they are in difficulty, etc. (for example, it’s okay
to phone home for a lift if they are stuck somewhere).  Ask them what they think
reasonable rules are – you might be surprised at how responsible they can be if you
start out by treating them as if they are responsible.  Show them the respect you want
them to show you, by negotiating firmly but fairly with them, instead of leaving them
to drift into a state of confusion and disconnection, or backing them into a position of
resentment and alienation.  Young people need a strong sense of identity and belonging,
so it is ideal that they can still feel comfortable at home.  Being brought into family
discussions makes them feel valued, and being helpful gives them a sense of responsibility;
both help them feel as if they belong.

Your teenagers need enough freedom to discover age appropriate things, like music
for example.  If you are going to try and prevent them from going to an event they can
hear down the road, then don’t be surprised if they disobey you and sneak out.  Try to be
realistic, then it is easier for them not to be tempted to defy you.  Far better to sit down
and say that you realise that they ought to be allowed more freedom as they grow up,
and say that you trust them, and hope that they will always feel able to come to you if
they get into any tricky situations.  Ask them to let you know if they feel the rules need
re­-negotiation as they prove themselves, and if they have any questions anytime at all.

Even much younger children can be really good at understanding situations.  When my
lads were still at junior school I would ask them why they thought it was wrong to do
certain things, to check their understanding, especially if something was dangerous.
I also sometimes asked them what punishment they thought they deserved for a
transgression and they were really harsh on themselves.  Even as toddlers standing in
the shopping trolley, I would ask them why they thought it was not a good idea for a
mother to buy the sweets her child was yelling for – and they knew well enough that if
you bought them under those circumstances, then the child would always know in future ~
that if he hollered loudly long enough he would ultimately get what he wanted.  So I would
reward good behaviour with a treat rather than the other way around, sometimes as we
left the shop and sometimes later – they knew I would be fair.  We used to have a red
plastic cake container that we kept those miniature versions of chocolates in, and also
little boxes of raisons (which they loved), and if it had been a good day they were often
allowed to pick a ‘red tin goodie’ after supper.  They would help choose the goodies for
the ‘tin’ in the shop, and that of course was a good opportunity to show how it was a good
idea to go for the special offers – 3 packets for the price of 2 meant the tin was fuller
and there was more choice.  They were really good at judging when they needed to go
to bed too, so showed good signs of developing self­-management skills.

So, I always say that children and young people ought to be given a lot of credit for their
understanding and good judgement, and consulted on things whenever possible.
Obviously you do not want to stress them by giving them too much inappropriate
information too early, but introducing things gradually makes it a lot easier for them to
grow up sensibly.  You wouldn’t want everything to come as a big shock all at once later on
would you?  Of course, spoiling people of any age can turn them into lazy users or even
manipulative control freaks, so you wouldn’t want to do everything for them anyway.
It doesn’t do them any favours in the long run as, apart from not learning anything, they
don’t have a chance to develop self respect or satisfaction through achievement and inclusion,
so they can become sullen, and bored too.  It is important to help them develop self esteem
in a balanced way, giving them the chance to try things, and win praise, but not so much that
they become over inflated either.  We want them to gain confidence but not become too
self­-opinionated.

Our Young People can become quite distressed and confused about life as they come
across so many new things going on. They tend to be quite sensitive about what is happening
in the world as they are trying to make sense of life and what it might mean to them, and
figure out what they want to do.  Things like wars, third world suffering, animal welfare,
environmental, ecological, and economic issues, powerful people getting away with things
they shouldn’t, etc, can all be great cause for concern.  It is no good trying to brush these
things under the carpet as that will not gain you respect; your young person does need to be
able to discuss them properly, form opinions, and consider things they might be able to do
to help change things, otherwise they might become depressed, or cynical.  They might also
be wondering why your generation has allowed these things to happen.  If you don’t really
know how to deal with these issues, then at least help find them places and people they can
turn to for information and advice.  Lots of organisations offer online information as well as
actions that can be taken, such as the chance to sign petitions or get involved in fundraising.

Teenagers also ideally need events to mark and celebrate their transitions into adulthood,
things that offer real meaning, that touch the deep person inside, so plan birthdays etc carefully
I have workshops to help with this transition, and information will be in one of my forthcoming
books, but in the meantime I will aim to write more articles about it. Young people might like to
do some things that are a bit different or special to help them on their journey like rock climbing,
martial arts, canoeing, etc –something to help them focus on a mind­, body, spirit level, to
integrate all these aspects of themselves into a balanced being.

Sometimes you might want to have a meeting with you, your partner, and one teenager at a time,
for discussion or debate.  Ask them to suggest topics to bring to the table, and you can do the
same, so you sort of have an agreed agenda.  You should make an effort not to sidetrack too
much so that you can focus on what you agreed, and don’t get into areas you haven’t prepared
for, or get caught up in emotional slanging. Everyone should be prepared to consider everyone
else’s feelings and viewpoints, and try to understand why they think and feel that way.  Don’t try
to coerce people to agree with you, or try to lay down any laws. Everyone should be allowed to
question or challenge, as long as it is done politely. Who knows what you might learn from your
teenager’s insight.

If you are coming to these sort of ideas late, when your teenager has already become
frustrated and bewildered, and there may be behavioural issues at home or at school or
both, then you could try explaining to them that you did not know what to do before but
that you want to try now.  You could ask them to help you to know how to help them.
It would probably make things worse if you said “You need to do this…. Or that…. Or
else…..”  Surely it would be better to say “What do you think we could do to help?”
Even if they reject you now (due to their pent up frustration or other emotions) don’t give
up, just say that you will be there for them if they want to approach you when they are
ready.  You can then suggest “Let’s sit down and discuss what we can (realistically) do to
make things work out better for everyone”.  Another suggestion could be, “We would
like you to help us understand how you feel and what you think about things so that we
can try to help…… “  There might also be a good time to point out that parents just don’t
always know that much about being parents, no one gets training, it’s just something you
try to learn how to do as you go along.  This can often defuse blame and anger in both
directions, as they suddenly realise that you can’t actually be expected to know
everything, and by the way, neither can they.  So hopefully we end up with both parties
now being willing to try again, because after all you do still care about each other or you
wouldn’t be having the conversation.

I don’t think it ever hurts for young people to know if we are struggling a bit with things,
it means that they will recognise that it isn’t an ‘us and them’ situation, we are all in this
life together, and it would be really great if we could be a team.   Of course, you don’t
want to overdo it and fall to pieces in front of them, just be natural.  A lot of the time
I think that people are too afraid to open up and share their feelings because they don’t
think that others can understand or empathise, so it makes them feel vulnerable to
ridicule; but actually it makes us all more human.

If there are things that parents find too difficult to handle themselves, then there is
nothing wrong with turning to outside help.It is far better than letting things slide.
You may find that a grandparent or uncle might be the right one to help, or it might
be the parents of one of your young person’s friends that they feel more at ease with,
or maybe even a professional mentor, or perhaps someone via school or college might
have the relevant experience.  It is that much easier for someone who is a bit detached
from the situation to bring a clearer perspective to things, so don’t feel jealous or
inadequate, just be grateful that your young person is getting some help.  Too often
in today’s society, families have been separated by having to move for a job, or other
reasons, so it is sometimes not so easy to access extended family support, which puts
all sorts of extra pressure on parents anyway.  Just try to make any outside help seem
as normal as possible rather than stigmatise it.  Whether it is official or unofficial it is
still essentially just a friendly ear, with perhaps some practical advice.

Hopefully you won’t have much problem, especially if you are already open to ideas such
as those expressed here.  Even if there are issues now, try not to panic too much about the
future, because things can always be improved with a little effort.  In the end, family love
usually wins through, and things get better sooner or later.  Stuff can be forgiven or put
into perspective, especially once your young people have children of their own and they
find out for themselves what it’s like to be a parent!

See our blog – Helping Our Young People to Think for Themselves

Power of Logic & Affirmations (for Anger Management etc)

Video

Power of Logic & Affirmations to Free us from Destructive Emotional Storms & Reclaim Respect & Control.

What is your relationship like with yourself?  Sometimes we let ourselves down, getting sucked into destructive emotional storms, even though we can see this ultimately works against our desired objectives.  Storms spew out far too much at once and thus tend to break everything down.  If we lose control in this way, we lose the respect of others, and might even lose respect for ourselves.

If we can stand back from our emotions and look at them logically, we can then find ways of training our minds to handle them differently.  To start with you can only do this after the event – when you are not in the midst of being caught up in the storm of emotions.  Gradually though, you will learn to do it as you begin to feel the emotions rise, or even in the middle of an event, to calm you down again.

It is much more logical to NOT LOSE or GIVE AWAY the power of positive possibility, by not giving in to negative turmoil, so don’t let yourself be overwhelmed!  If you do, then you are literally just giving away your power to the other people involved, or losing it to the situation itself.

So, let’s consider these affirmations to help us build up positive power and learn to keep it going for ourselves.

Could you please ensure you are sitting comfortably in a position that allows you to breathe deeply and slowly as you listen
Please try not to put up resistance to the affirmations, they are designed to help you get past blocks, and the more you listen to them the more they will help you.
Please try to listen with your eyes closed so that you are relaxed and focused.  They will be read out slowly enough for you to absorb them, like a guided meditation.
If you really feel a resistance to the idea of listening, then please at least read the affirmations through to yourself.  I suggest doing this several times over a period of several days, until you do feel ready to listen to them.  Being relaxed and just listening will help them get through at a deeper level, when you are ready to be open to this.

THE AFFIRMATIONS

I feel confident in myself as a person, to do what I need to do in life.

I do not let what other people think affect this, however I am willing to learn from valid comments, and let go of all the rest as being irrelevant.

I do not waste my power and energy on worrying about what others think, I merely reconsider my own situation honestly, and move on.

I will not become upset by criticism, or take any of it personally.  I am not responsible for other people’s thoughts or needs, only for my own.

I will simply consider if there are any points worth learning from, and let go of anything else.

I do not react in a way that shuts me off from the possibility of learning.

Sometimes I accept that people are going to say things because they believe they should, and I am able to let that go, like water off a ducks back, if I feel it is not valid.

I do not let it anger me, I let it slide off, let it go.

I realize that melodrama can be addictive.  It may seem exciting, but it really gets in the way of things.  I therefore choose not to waste my time & energy on that, instead of progressing.

It is more important to use my time and energy to move forward with situations.

I do not allow myself to succumb to reactions that get in the way of making the best of things.

I simply breathe to let emotions go, and move on with life.

I accept that people have a right to their opinions, but they do not need to affect me, unless I think they have a valid point for me to consider.

I accept that sometimes they may even wish to help me, and I accept that sometimes this may actually be of benefit, so I don’t allow my emotions to cloud my ability to listen.

I do not allow negative emotions to get in the way of my progress.

Any judgement is gently dismissed – as if blown away on the breeze.

I will not put up resistance, I will simply let it go.

I understand that if I try to resist something it only brings negative power to the situation, when it would be better to move on to something more positive.

I do not give away my energy, and precious time, by indulging in these negatives, but turn instead to directing my energy towards the next steps.

I am focused on making something new and better.

As I breathe out, I take my attention to more positive thoughts.

I begin to see more clearly what I could do next to improve the situation, instead of being caught up in churning it over and over.

I notice the good things around me, and in my life, and smile to myself.

I can even see the good things in people more easily, and the positive potential of situations.

I know that if I can let go of irrelevant stuff and relax, I am much more able to do well.

This applies to all my relationships, as well as to situations – partner, children, friends, and even those I have to do business with.

I am also developing a better relationship with myself.

I know that I can get on well with myself and my life if I let go, rather than let myself get wound up by others.

I realize that letting others wind me up only gives them power over me, so I choose instead to keep my power for myself, and direct it to where I want it to be.

I realize that anger, resentment, and bitterness actually sabotages myself.

So I do not allow myself to shoot myself in the foot, because this is obviously illogical.

I focus on my breath instead, and calm and let go in each moment.

I consider things logically later, when I am in a safe place to do so.

I know that I have the power to be COOL, CALM, and COLLECTED and to not allow others, or situations, to affect my own best ways of managing things.

I breathe in the calmness and let it fill my body right up.

I focus on feeling it coming in with each breath.

I feel powerful and in control.

I know I can find my best way forward whatever the situation.

I trust myself to keep steady.

I allow myself to unwind whenever I need to so that I can then get on with moving forwards.

I realise that animosity and stubbornness can get in my way.

I can see that there is nothing to be achieved from arguing over a point.

It is best for me to consider things later and decide for myself how to best move forward.

I do not waste time and energy on arguing because I know it is much more important to focus that energy on moving forward positively.

I keep my eyes on the positive because this allows the negatives to just slip away.

I do not give my energy away, or allow it become scattered.

I draw on it to help me, and those close to me, to succeed and be happy.

I hold my power gently within the centre of my body.

I can use it for myself and those close to me anytime I want to.

I realise that it is better to be humble and considerate, which lets life flow,  than to shout and wrestle, which only puts up resistance to life.

I do not let animosity and stubbornness arise, I simply breathe in to CALM and move on to a more positive focus.

I realize that volatile emotions are usually destructive, and I know that I do not want to destroy relationships or situations, so I breathe out to let any unwanted emotions go.

I want to give things the best chance of working out, so I direct my energy to that, and the positive things I can do.

I always remind myself to let go and calm, so that I can keep focussed.

I breathe to relax so that I can go on as positively as possible.

I CHOOSE the power of logic over the power of destruction.

I choose not to waste my energy on anger, bitterness, and fear of results, but to focus my energy on getting the good things done instead.

I choose not to waste my energy on worry either, as I realize that it is all hypothetical, so I use all the energy to ensure getting the best results.

I focus now and every day on moving things forward positively.

I know that I can do this.  I trust myself to do this.

I breathe in the calmness anytime I need it, and I let go of all the negatives, so that I can be the best I can be.

I do not put undue pressure on myself though, I relax wonderfully into being my best self.

I feel power gathering in me when I breathe, filling me up and helping me to progress steadily.

I feel power, like oxygen, in every cell of my body, and smile, or nod.

The smile, or nod, switches on a light in the centre of my body, and in my head.

I feel the light filling me up too, as it flows around my head, and around my body, in my blood.

I feel that I am growing as I become more filled with light and gentle power.

I feel the strength of my self-belief expand in a calm and sure way.

Now I am easily able to let go of stuff I don’t need – anytime I want to.

I trust myself to be calm yet powerful.

Calm, DIGNIFIED power fills me, and lifts me, now, and anytime I need it.

I now understand how to conserve my personal power, as well as how to build it up.

I am now ready to begin to live in each new moment with more  and more of this steady power available and able to help me.

I know that I am now able to take more and more control of my future.

I will use these affirmations regularly, because each time I do so, I will take them on at a deeper level, and become more and more able to use them consistently, and even automatically.

I feel confident in myself as a person, to do what I need to do.

By facing up to things instead of obscuring them with emotional storms, I earn more and more respect.

I know now that quiet assertion is a much better way to say what I need to say, than to get sucked into melodrama.

I am now able to focus on the important points, and communicate effectively & efficiently, instead of wasting time and energy going in circles and dragging in unnecessary stuff.

I now command & deserve respect from others, and I also have more respect for myself/

I am steady and focused as I now go about my life.

Now open your eyes and stretch or move around to ensure you are fully awake.
Have a drink of water maybe.
Discuss your impressions if you wish, or simply hold them inside you for your own reference.

Take the power with you at whatever level you are ready to choose, and return to the affirmations anytime you wish to remind yourself about them, or to take them on at deeper levels.

Note if your impressions & responses change each time you do them.

There are many more self-help tools available via our website www.radiance-solutions.co.uk

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Spiritual Coaching 1 – Video

Video

Top Tips – Our Total Wellbeing in this world – physical, emotional, mental, spiritual – related in sequence of our relevant energy centres.

SCRIPT – Spiritual Coaching TOP TIPS

Hi, I’m Julia Woodman, Writer, Counsellor, Healer, & Personal Development Coach (amongst other things), and my main TOP TIP is that

EACH ONE OF YOU has the power to be the masters of your own life.

Develop confidence by using spiritual or personal development tools, and allow yourself to grow gently through the years – training your mind to help you rather than hinder you. Be heart centred and steady instead of emotionally volatile and vulnerable.

Now I am going to split my main tip into seven sections to match the (coloured) energy centres of the body from the base upwards.

• ROOT – Grounding, and Safety or Security.
Anchor yourself to the world so that you can experience life fruitfully here. Understand that F.E.A.R. stands for ‘false evidence appearing real’ – know that you can learn to see beyond it and be the master of your own life. Aim to develop a sense that you can cope with life, using a combination of your own instincts and skills, plus the help of others in this human team. Be willing to help others in return, though it may not be the same ones who helped you, it’s all a cycle. Life itself is a natural cycle. Maintain an awareness of your roots.

• SACRAL Centre – Vitality, and Connection with the Wonder all around you.
Be aware – observe details in nature, and consider animal and human behaviour. Appreciate the incredible beauty and unlimited variety in life. Find ways to be creative, and nurture ideas. It is amazing what we can do, and how things work. Focus on the vitality in your body and mind as you move and think and enjoy life. Collect inspiring motivational quotes and natural beautiful things. Enjoy the raw energy available in life.

• SOLAR PLEXUS – Self Esteem and Confidence.
Recognise that you can change your views any time you choose to. You are the sum total of what has been passed on to you, and of what you have learnt, thus far — therefore it always keeps changing as you grow. Nobody has all the answers, and each of us has a slightly different perspective anyway, so don’t hide your individuality, express it, and respect the individuality of others. Feel your self esteem growing as you realise that you have the power to keep learning new stuff and making your own choices about who you want to be and how you want to live. Take responsibility, seek experience, and learn what you need to, with the express intention of fulfilling your sense of self. Let the sun shine for you.

• HEART – LOVE dissolves all negativity.
We come from the same origins, but have differing viewpoints, so don’t judge others, let them be. Accept that they have as much right as you, to do what they wish, to make ‘mistakes’, to learn or not. Forgive them instead of taking anything personally. Holding onto resentment only hurts you, so surrender it. Boost yourself with positive thinking tools such as affirmations. Look for the positive sides of people & events. Take the opportunity to learn from things that ‘go wrong’. Let the wonderful greens and pinks of nature caress your heart.

• THROAT – Clarity and Communication.
Be clear with yourself about what you want from life, as this will automatically guide you. Communicate with others clearly, and with patience & consideration. Show them how to understand your viewpoint & let them show you how to understand theirs. Try not to bother with small stuff, focus on what is most important, and plan your approach. Show gratitude for all the good things. Let the clear stream flow.

• BROW – Follow your Intuition.
It is a path into the deep side of yourself that knows things that you may not consciously be aware of, especially if your mind is cluttered or stressed. Use tools such as visualisations, and meditation to help train your mind to be steady and more able to work for your specific benefit, instead of getting in the way. Trust that deep blue.

• CROWN – We all seek the Bliss of Union.
From trusted friendships, to lovers and life partners, to connecting with what we might think of as an ultimate creative force, or being, or stream of consciousness. Allow yourself time for this, but don’t try to force it, everything will flow into place naturally as you humbly become more and more of yourself. Let the beautiful spiritual purple bathe you.

Good luck — and do feel free to ask me more about this.

Julia Woodman — Radiance Solutions

http://www.radiance-solutions.co.uk

Safe Cave Meditation for Relaxation, Renewal, and Confidence

Video

this was written on request for a client

Safe Cave Meditation for Relaxation, Renewal & Confidence – THE SCRIPT (includes some extra tips at the end)

You know there is a cave somewhere
in your imagination – that you can go to
if you want PEACE & QUIET.
I want you to take yourself there now
and just wander around checking it out
before you sit down in the best spot.

You feel SAFE in your cave, and secure.
It’s a place where you can be CALM
and RELAX, and LET GO of worries.
It’s a place where you can REST
and RE-CHARGE before carrying on.
It’s a place you can ride out ANY storm.

So settle down and make sure
you are comfortable & warm.
Now take some LONG SLOW BREATHS
and count them as you let go of worries – 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 –
As you count you RELAX more & more – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 –
Count until you feel sleepy – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12.

RELAX & RELEASE ALL YOUR THOUGHTS –
If any thoughts do arise, just set them aside –
let them wash away in the stream
that is gurgling gently nearby.
LET ANY TENSIONS GO TOO –
wash, washing away in the stream.

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Now FEEL SOFT LIGHTS in your cave –
Maybe fairy candles or glow worms – to SOOTHE you.
They have come to help you RE-CHARGE.
So now focus on RENEWING YOURSELF.
Feel their light COMFORTING you
and gently giving you NEW ENERGY.

With every BREATH, feel more LIGHT
steadily coming INTO your body.
BREATHE IT IN and feel it in your chest & abdomen –
in ALL parts of your body, your head, and your limbs.
Now feel it warming your heart
with the YELLOW LIGHT OF CONFIDENCE.

Also now you feel an ORANGE GLOW
in the lower parts of your body,
which gives you a sense of STRENGTH.
Feel that VITALITY spread –
and join with the yellow confident light
and RISE OUT TO SURROUND YOU.

You now have A BUBBLE PROTECTING YOU,
which you can take out into the world
and use anytime to BOOST yourself.
Use it for difficult situations
to keep you STEADY in yourself.
TRUST yourself to REMEMBER this.

Now just focus on your breathing
as you FEEL THAT ENERGY IN & AROUND YOU.
Give thanks for this, and everything else you have to be grateful for.
Then count again, backwards to retunr – 12 – 11 – 10 – and on
to – 9 – 8 – 7 – 6 – 5 – breathing more lightly now – 4 – 3 – 2 – 1 –
and feel yourself ready to stretch, and rise up.

Move about a bit, rub hands on thighs etc – if you need to ensure you come back fully to the present moment. If you go deep into a meditation, it can take a few moments to be properly present afterwards. Having a drink of water helps too.

After a bit of practice with your imagination, you should be able to imagine that bubble around you at any moment you might need it. After a bit more time, it can even happen automatically, so you will then never feel quite so vulnerable again.
If you want to, you could even ask the fairies or glow worms to make you wings, and feel what it is like to wear them, and imagine what you could do with them. You can then imagine you have them any time you want to rise above a situation.
You can use just the first part of this meditation to help you fall asleep if you have difficulty with this. You could use the second half to help you wake up in the morning too if you wish.
If you have difficulties with communication, or need to prepare for a public performance, you could also add in a bit where the lovely pale blue of the stream water rinses your throat, washing away fear of speaking, and letting you feel what it is like to be clear, and concise, with what you want to say, so that you can use this experience in real life too.
There is a saying in LIFE COACHING that if you ACT AS IF something is true (pretend you are, for example, cool, calm, and collected), then it is like having the real experience of being that, so it becomes easier for you to learn that skill. (This can even apply to falling asleep – if you have trouble with this, then act as if you are pretending to someone else that you are asleep, like children sometimes do with parents, then before you know it, it may actually be so.)
Another way to boost confidence is to say “I can do it, I can do it, I can do this!” to the rhythm of your steps when walking, or hand claps, like a chant or mantra. Children could have fun with that part of it too, or might like to make up their own. So might you.
julia@radiance-solutions.co.uk can help you create your own meditations, visualisations, affirmations, or other personal and spiritual development tools.
There are also a lot of tools already available via http://www.radiance-solutions.co.uk

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Stardust Meditation

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A meditation to relax, let go of stuff, gather and renew your energy.

on SoundCloud firstl ink – or on YouTube below

Self empowering – Stardust Meditation

 

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Stardust Meditation as a Video on YouTube

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Stardust Meditation – THE SCRIPT

Hi, this is Julia Woodman from Radiance Solutions. Thank you so much for joining us today, and I hope you will enjoy this meditation.

To begin with, please take several deep breaths, and relax all parts of your body. Start with your shoulders, let them move up and down with the first few breaths to release tension, then after your breaths settle down to a steady rate, begin to relax from the top of your head, down.

Feel your scalp relax, then your neck. Now relax your face muscles, your jaw, and again your neck, and shoulders, then your arms, and hands.
Feel the centre of your chest relaxing as you breathe gently now, and your abdomen,
then your hips, thighs, knees, lower legs, and feet. Wriggle your toes and fingers slightly if it helps.

Now please imagine yourself in a beautiful and special place where you feel safe and strong.
Take a moment to ensure you are settled in there.

Now, align your head with the sky, the planets, and all the elements of life out there.
Think of that wonderful universe to which we are all connected.
Feel that connection deep within you.

Now feel our mother earth beneath you
Align the core of your body with her generous beautiful energy.

Let go of any negative energies you might have been holding on to.
Let go of any worry, blame, anger, guilt.
Let these energies go from wherever they might be hidden in your body or mind.
Sigh and move a little if it helps to let it let it all go.
Feel yourself filled with gratitude for life instead.

Let go of any lies or false stories you might have been holding on to.
Feel all this coming out of any part of you it might have been weakening.
Allow mother earth and sister sky to transmute them into harmless ash.

They now give you back your energy you have been tying up and wasting on these things.
Feel it in pure form, pouring into you, filling you up, strengthening all parts of you.

Now feel the energy between the heavens and the earth meeting in your body.
They relax you deeply and balance your spine and all your energy centres.
Feel the wonderful warm loving energy caressing the insides of your body.
It is healing anything that might have been getting in your way.

Now we are going to collect any other energy which may have been scattered so that you can totally renew yourself.

Bring back any of your energy that has been left in the past or that may have gone ahead into the future. Bring all your energy back into the NOW. If you simply ask it, you body knows how to pull it back. Ask it right now to gather that energy up, and feel it coming in.
Keep breathing softly while every scrap of that scattered energy returns to you.

Now, let go of attachments to things you don’t need any more
Claim that energy back now too.
Feel your body fill with all the returning energy.

Re-claim any energy unconsciously tied up in fear – or in judgement of your self or others.
Put the returning energy in your creative power pot.
You now have more energy than you ever dreamed possible. You can create your own magic in life.

Reassure your inner child that she doesn’t need to protect you any more.
Give it a hug and explain that you are grown up now, a mature being who can take care of their own thoughts and actions, but that you will always love that child, and will still often have fun playing games with it in your special places in this lovely world.

Ask you deep inner self to always remind you to honour the world and the universe, and every living thing, by being who you truly are and sharing your gifts with joy and love.

Feel your body tingling with golden hearts and stardust — all the elements you need to return you to your true and sacred power.

You are now free and complete. Give thanks, then when you are ready, wriggle your toes and fingers again, then stretch to bring yourself fully out of the meditation.

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Absolution from Absolutes – and the Cycle of Change

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There are no absolutes in the world, not really, so don’t expect too much from yourself, anyone else, or anything – but please don’t get cynical or judgemental either.

Just keep trying to be who you want to be – but don’t be uptight about it – try to relax into it.  Be ready to forgive yourself and others for not being perfect – just try to view ‘mistakes’ or unexpected events as an opportunity to learn.

You can ask yourself and others to do things, or behave in certain ways, and you may plan as clearly and carefully as possible, but we can all only do our best as fallible human beings, each with our own limited knowledge and experience.  So life tends to be full of  setbacks and misunderstandings, but we can ultimately overcome these.

Don’t worry about it – as worry is just a waste of energy.  Just quietly develop your plans.  Choose to take the power into your own hands and choose who or what it is you want to be or do – and plan how to achieve it.

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A life coach can help to advise you, but he or she is just there to help you make realistic and achievable goals that work for you and what you wish to achieve – the ultimate responsibility still lies with yourself.  They help you plan in measurable and timely steps or stages – along with planning for the necessary support, rewards, etc, and they can also help with advice such as how to discuss things with others.

If you are not sure what you want, then a good coach can also help you work this out.  Try listing possibilities, and scoring them according to how you feel about each.  Don’t be blocked by how difficult anything might seem, just be guided by how interested you are in doing it.  If needed, a coach (or counsellor) can also chat with you to tease out what you think any issues might be and help look at them with a different perspective.

You also have the power to help others plan their achievements – see the positives in them and try to express gladness to encourage them with their progress.  This might apply to a friend, or even to a person doing some work for you.  Your support can make it easier for them to get results.  If you greet a workman by telling him you are impressed with his timing, for example, and offering him a hot drink, then he will be inclined to work well for you, and you will both be pleased.

True friends (hopefully including your close family) are people who help their friends to be who they truly are, and will remind them if they deviate from that or act out of character.  They will also support them in their efforts to achieve any change or goals, so they would for example not smoke in front of them if they are in the process of giving up, or not insist on buying them a drink if they are driving, and they would understand and give them space if they needed to study for example instead of going out with them quite so often.  Someone might even offer to take on a task such as babysitting to enable you to do what you need to do.

Don’t be afraid to ask people to listen to your point of view, or to consider your needs and feelings.  If you are able to explain then there is every chance they will be helpful.

If you have a particular thing you wish to discuss, it is best to ask to set some time aside for this rather than just randomly try to throw it into a conversation.

Don’t be afraid to try new things – say yes if an interesting opportunity arises – and then take the time to plan.  Anyone can learn new skills, reach new targets, or have an adventure, if they are prepared to try.

Change could be in any area including: communication, habits or patterns of behaviour,  financial or economical, career or work-life balance, a move, relationships, fitness, health, taking up a hobby, further study, etc.

Live on Purpose.  Change is natural, there is no need to fear it, just give yourself the tools to enable the change to happen as you would wish it.

Don’t be tempted to give up if there is a setback or relapse – the cycle of change allows for this – the thing is to recognise this for what it is and just get back on the wheel.

You need to be aware that it is normal to start going well, with all the initial motivation kicking in, and then you may get a bit disheartened when you run out of initial puff, so this is the time to really be prepared – have something else in place to see you through this tough stage – like a friend to come round and help out or just chat, or go out for a meal, or take a break (such as a weekend away) to renew yourself and build up more energy, or search for new inspiration. You could even do something nice for someone else to help boost your self esteem.

Don’t allow yourself to keep flopping out in the same place – you must figure out how to get past each stage, and you will be rewarded with your own delicious sense of success

OUR LIFE COACHING PACK
All 3 of my Achievable Goal Planning Sections in one bundle – How to Maximise Success, Help to Decide, and all FORMS to assist you
1 – How to HELP yourself DECIDE WHAT you really want to do.
Help with deciding on your goals in the first place. It’s best to get really clear before you begin the planning stage so that you don’t waste time and effort. For example, you could be trying to decide which course to study, what to do as a career (or change of career), or for a hobby etc, but you can also apply it to any decision you are not sure about (like moving home, ending a relationships, travelling etc). We do sometimes subconsciously block our own progress, particularly if we are not sure what we want, or if we don’t have enough self esteem or confidence in ourselves.
2 – HOW TO develop achievable Goal Plans, and put realistic Timescales, Support, and Rewards in place TO MAXIMISE SUCCESS
Includes details of what to think about before starting your plan. Includes details of how to prepare plans successfully by avoiding certain pitfalls.  Includes details of how to keep motivated and communicate your needs to rally support.
3 – Goal Setting FORMS
Includes blank form for your use, plus a tutor form with guidelines on, plus several examples.
Examples include: 1) paying off debts, 2) losing weight & getting fit alongside study times, job, and committee obligations,  3) planning workshops with all the admin etc included, and 4) Improving Belief in Self as Parent and as having Valuable Skills & a Right to a Career of Own Choosing.

http://www.radiance-solutions.co.uk/essenceguides.htm

LUCKYCLOVER4

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Dealing With Stress: Regaining Self-esteem and Making Choices

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There are many stress symptoms below Julia discusses these and offers advice on dealing with stress as well as tips to improve your self-esteem.

Stress is something that can build up gradually without us noticing too much and then suddenly it becomes intolerable and we snap. Often we are forced to take a break from work, which then gives us time to think, and we realise that we need to re-organise ourselves. Or it might not be work-related, it might be a family or relationship situation than needs a rethink.

Gradually we may have given up our power – our personal power – to others – letting them tell us what to do more and more, and letting them push us harder and harder too. Often we let others walk all over principles, or ruin our environment with poisonous sniping and unfair demands.

We may know exactly what we want to do about it, or we may like some help and support to obtain some relief, then work through the issues and decide how best to move forward. We may also need help to plan whatever changes we wish to make. As a counsellor and life coach, I can help in both these areas.

Recognising Stress

Ideally if you recognise that you could do with some help before a situation gets too bad, then we can usually deal with things more constructively. I can help you by first clarifying the situation exactly, including your feelings about it, and then figuring out how best to sort things out. Communication can be key here, and I can help advise on that, and can even mediate if necessary. I can also help show you ways of dealing better with stress in the first place.

I have many tools to help you take back your power. I can help you re-connect with the deep self within, and re-kindle your joy in life. Awareness heightens your ability to make choices earlier and be more clear about your intentions too. Affirmations, inspirational quotes, and snippets of wisdom, all help boost your self esteem. Visualisations help give you relief and a sense of calm. Meditation takes you deeper – into a sense of bliss that arises from a combination of personal and universal power. Creativity helps you express yourself, and your appreciation of life. All this adds up to give you confidence to do what you want to with your time on earth, to make your life uniquely fulfilling – instead of stressful.

Life coaching is particularly suited to help you first of all be sure about what it is you want to achieve, and then plan for success, using realistic time scales for each step, with rewards for achievement along the way to help keep up your motivation. I am here to offer you support of course, but you should also ask those around you to be supportive to help keep you on track. However, if you do slip a bit, don’t beat yourself up about it, just get back on the road when you are ready.

Choice

You always have the power to choose whether to continue as you are, or whether to make changes. Even if you go on with what you are doing, then at least you will have very consciously chosen to do that….. it becomes easier once you have evaluated why you are making that choice. Awareness brings clarity to life. You are your own master.

Of course, counselling can help you deal with any issues, so that you can move on more effectively. Emotional baggage can set you back, but I can help you let it go. Also we can often get in our own way, for example, with fears sabotaging our attempts to progress. Effective communication is vital, whether it be at work, or with family, children, or friends. I can also help with relationships and sexuality. It is natural for us to have sensual and joyful relationships with those close to us and with the world around us. If you don’t identify with that, then let me help you discover these delights, which will add greatly to your sense of fulfilment as a human being. This in turn will help you find satisfaction in your other life choices, such as your career, and help you handle anything that’s needed to exist optimally.

I also love to work with young people, helping them make a meaningful transition into adulthood with a huge mixture of offerings and skills. Identity and belonging are areas we are weak on in our present day society, and this often results in a lack of understanding, confusion, disconnection, and emotional anguish, but nonetheless I can help.

In the meantime, let me end with a quote from Shakespeare:

“To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.”

Access our full stress busting guide here

MASTERY –  Imperatives for a Masterful Life – Awareness & Intention / (So called MASTERY and what it might be, or mean. / Roundup – Beliefs & Aims / What is the Source of Life? / Does what we Believe affect what Happens to us? / What is the Nature of ‘God’ & Why would Jesus have been Crucified to save us from our sins? / What Really Matters? / What else might matter? / What can we learn to be? / What does a ‘master’ know? / What does one strive for if one wishes to work towards mastery? / Are there such things as soul contracts? / Do we learn on behalf of the ALL that is, so that the collective ONE can evolve too? / Why do ‘bad’ things happen? / As we become ‘masters’, do we find ourselves recreated anew in each moment as the same being we chose ourselves to be in the last moment, or do we continue to evolve? / HUMILITY / A little more on INTENTION / Looking back at ‘mastery’ / What might happen after death? / AWARENESS – Everywhere & Nowhere / A brief simple but powerful MEDITATION, using your intention to help others. / STREAM poem / Meditation – How to use it for Subtle Activism / Free Thinking – Helping our Young People to Think for themselves / BEING REAL – Lennon in the Collective Consciousness / You Are the ONE poem.)

Aailable from our website – http://www.radiance-solutions.co.uk/essenceguides.htm

Many more guides, such as MEDITATION ones, are also available from this page,
and also EASY AFFIRMATIONS TO EMPOWER YOU
and EASY VISUALISATIONS TO RELAX AND INSPIRE YOU

plus
OUR LIFE COACHING PACK
All 3 of my Achievable Goal Planning Sections in one bundle – How to Maximise Success, Help to Decide, and all FORMS to assist you
1 – How to HELP yourself DECIDE WHAT you really want to do.
Help with deciding on your goals in the first place. It’s best to get really clear before you begin the planning stage so that you don’t waste time and effort. For example, you could be trying to decide which course to study, what to do as a career (or change of career), or for a hobby etc, but you can also apply it to any decision you are not sure about (like moving home, ending a relationships, travelling etc). We do sometimes subconsciously block our own progress, particularly if we are not sure what we want, or if we don’t have enough self esteem or confidence in ourselves.
2 – HOW TO develop achievable Goal Plans, and put realistic Timescales, Support, and Rewards in place TO MAXIMISE SUCCESS
Includes details of what to think about before starting your plan. Includes details of how to prepare plans successfully by avoiding certain pitfalls.  Includes details of how to keep motivated and communicate your needs to rally support.
3 – Goal Setting FORMS
Includes blank form for your use, plus a tutor form with guidelines on, plus several examples.
Examples include: 1) paying off debts, 2) losing weight & getting fit alongside study times, job, and committee obligations,  3) planning workshops with all the admin etc included, and 4) Improving Belief in Self as Parent and as having Valuable Skills & a Right to a Career of Own Choosing.

http://www.radiance-solutions.co.uk/essenceguides.htm

LUCKYCLOVER4

Access our full stress busting guide here

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PEERS: Public Education and Empowerment Resource Service

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PEERS: Public Education and Empowerment Resource Service.

A great source of all sorts of knowledge……

Plus do come and join us at Back to The Garden website

and our open Back to The Garden GROUP on Facebbok.

One of the books I am writing now will also be called Back to The Garden – so by joining in and sharing information and ideas, you may have some influence on this.  The group also practices subtle activism – a type of distance meditation (at regular allotted times so that many of us together make more of a difference) to plant positive thought seeds into the collective consciousness.

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Be The Best You For The New Year

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I wrote this blog for another website this time last year, so I can share it here now.  The fact that I wrote it for another site, accounts for the different sort of tone than I normally use, please forgive me for that, try to look at it as a bit of fun, and do please let me know what you think!

Okay, so right from the start I will ask you to bear with me as I am going to be a bit tough here. It’s to get the best out of you – for your own good – IF you really want to be the best you. [Actually it’s not hard work, it’s just the concepts that may be challenging.]

So I want you to promise me that if I say something that really pulls a chord within you, don’t throw your hands up – give yourself a chance – take it as an opportunity to help yourself learn and grow! Delight in your ability to take on something that really matters – your responsibility to yourself – delight in the challenge.

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Now, I’m not saying anybody’s ever going to be ‘perfect’ – I’m certainly not! All we can do is be the best we know how to be, and aim to keep moving forward with that as we learn more how we can do that. The concept of ‘perfection’ is misleading in itself because to be perfectly human simply means just to be human – to accept yourself as you are – but from there on in, to strive to be truly, fully, that which you are, more and more completely, so that you can enjoy life in all it’s abundance, utterly.

I doesn’t mean saying “This is me, put up with it!”. It does mean getting to that place where you can say “Yeah, this is me – this is how I feel good in myself – and this is how I can feel happy to go out in the world. This is the me I want to share, with all my skills, caring, strength, unique characteristics, etc.

So take a deep breath, and promise yourself that you are going to reward yourself with this good feeling. You are not going to be puffed up with artificial pride and pretend that you are above others though – you are going to be humbly at peace with yourself. You are going to accept the full flow of joy in your life, which is balanced because it goes both ways – you show yourself to life and to the world, and life and the world show themselves to you – it is all quite natural.

Even if things get tricky, you are not going to give up and be a baby – you are going to take a bit of space for yourself to accept the beautiful life stream deeply into yourself, to renew, boost, strengthen, and calm you. As you breathe, feel it flowing into your heart from everywhere around you, the earth, the universe. It flows in through all parts of your body and lifts you up to a higher frequency.

Allow yourself to rest in this while you take stock – as you start to steady, ask for understanding and inspiration to flow into you along with the energy – and look for what you can learn from the situation, which will then show you how to move ahead again and deal with things.

Now I want you to get yourself past blocks that might be limiting you. You have learned things in your childhood and from your experiences that have coloured your views so that you don’t see the full picture. You have formed judgements and beliefs based on limited teachings and viewpoints. That’s nobody’s fault – it’s just one of those things that happens due to the very nature of our vulnerability – it’s just something we have to realise and grow past. So now I want you to open up to the possibility that things could be different. You aren’t going to let these limitations block you from being who you fully can be – are you?

I want you to realise that this is the same for everybody at some point, but people manage to get beyond it – some more easily than others – but really it is just a matter of not holding on to things that aren’t helping you. Once you recognise what your blocks are, you can release them – because you know they don’t really belong to you and to where your life is going now. Or you can do it the easy way and just decide to be open to all possibilities, decide to just not accept limitations, because you are the best person to know who you really can be if you just let go and allow life to welcome you.

Who wants to be limited by the thoughts of others? So take on your own responsibility for what you believe your reality to be. Do you really believe you should be limited in your journey of discovering who you really can be? NO! Then be true to yourself – find out what you REALLY feel, who you REALLY are.

You aren’t a child anymore – you should not expect to be molly-coddled by others – you should stand up & earn your right to be truly loved – not pandered to because people are afraid you might sulk or get stroppy – but loved for being your honest self. If you were spoilt as a child then don’t let that go on spoiling your life – let go of the belief that everything should go your way, and learn a bit of give and take. If you try to manipulate people then they will treat you with equal disrespect. Grow up – this is me and you here – you’re an adult now – and adults should not be spoilt brats.

Adults go on learning for themselves, instead of depending on others – they learn how to go on growing into themselves – into the people they truly should be.

They expand into the largeness of all the fascinating possibilities that life offers, the opportunities to learn, and to be a magnificently fulfilled human being. When you become yourself, as you gently grow into each moment as more and more of who you can be, then you are opening yourself up completely to love and life in all its forms – beauty, abundance, meaningfulness, balanced relationships….. and so much more.

It is honestly all your choice to either:

  1. Pretend to be something or someone else, constantly having to pull more tricks out of the box to impress or try to cover up lies, always desperately hoping that your house of cards won’t fall down just yet, but sick inside because deep down you know that it will one day. Then you will probably lose all the meaningless things you have hoarded.
  2. Not bother with any attempt at becoming yourself, just muddling through by playing all sorts of games, such as blaming others and thus trying to manipulate them through guilt, or acting like some sort of helpless victim and thus trying to force others into helping because they feel sorry for you. You are probably also leaning on some sort of addictions here, to try to hide your fright from even yourself, your feeling of not being able to cope with the realities of life. (There are a whole host of addictions other than just drink & drugs by the way, count in gratuitous sex or violence, excessive food or sleep, gambling of course, high speeds and risk taking, and anything else that gives you a temporary but meaningless thrill, or that just numbs you..)
  3. Drop the falsehoods and become you. Along with this you will drop all fears of losing control, or of being discovered as a fraud, or as a useless waste of space, so you will go out into the world and find it coming to greet you in such an amazing way. It will provide you with all that you need to show up for yourself and those around you as a valid, useful, reliable, understanding, fair, warm, loveable human being.

It is in your power to be a balanced, happy person – if you are prepared to take on truth. Truly – you have the power to be wonderful. So let’s get together – imagine I am there with you, asking you:

  1. What’s stopping you?
  2. Why are you letting it?
  3. What are you going to do about it?

Deep down you know the answers. Learn to listen to this voice from the heart of your very being, and trust it. This is your best ever guide.

If you used to believe that you had to do things in certain ways to get what you wanted – then let go of that belief now. You feel light as all that complicated weight falls away. All you have to do is find out who the true you is, and be that. You don’t need to manipulate or control anything. You don’t need to be afraid of being found out. Just be yourself, honestly, openly, and the world will respond to you more positively.

Bring the energy of the universe and the earth into your body – tell yourself that it is supporting you – just as it does others who are being true to themselves – and that is the only support you really need. Of course family and friends, and even colleagues, will be supportive too – as they recognise you becoming at last the true you, they will feel more love and generosity towards you, and they may even look to you as an example. They will reflect your inner light and respond to your lightness of being in more natural and open ways. The new you will be greeted by the world in a new way. People’s response to you reflects back to you who you are now.

Greet this new year with an open face and an open heart – you know that you have the power to keep expanding. It’s easy once you have started! Your sense of peace increases as your self-knowledge and self-acceptance increases. Your strength comes from honestly knowing yourself and always aiming to be the best that you can be.

Don’t make empty resolutions about this or that external little thing – make one huge resolution to give yourself to yourself. Then everything else will quite effortlessly fall into place.

Oh – and don’t ever get angry with yourself for past idiocies – laugh them off. Don’t hold onto them or they only harm you – just acknowledge them briefly so that you have learned something from the mistake, then let them go and move beyond. So laugh, thank yourself for noticing the silliness, then surrender all the stuff that you don’t need any more – feel lighter as you let it go. Exactly the same applies to others – don’t blame anyone for anything, just surrender it and move on. Now you are wiser, you can handle things differently. Don’t be arrogant about it though, or believe me, the universe will throw tests at you. Surrender the misleading desires of your ego along with the rest of it – it doesn’t matter what anyone else does or thinks, it is what you do yourself that shows up who you are being in each moment. We all make slip-ups – just forgive, whether it is yourself or others, or both, and journey on towards your next best self.

Clear out things you don’t want, mentally, emotionally, and actual physical clutter. Clear the space for new things to grow, like weeding the garden to provide space for new seeds, and to give the plants you do want to keep the best chance to flourish, blossom, provide food for body, heart, and soul.

Trust your instinct to know the answers to your own questions, and what to do next. Energise your life – unlock your skills and abilities. Step out of the shadows, release binds, and clear blocks – like false beliefs, blame, guilt, anger, self-sabotage, doubt. There is no room for indecision if you are clear about what you want.

Write notes to yourself to help you clarify your aims, and clear your head. Set plans in place to take easy breezy steps towards your goals. Don’t be distracted or allow yourself to get confused or side-tracked. What you do must feel right and true to you. Don’t accept less than what you seek. Make a list of your values and tick them off as you confirm that you are living by them. Love your life – and it helps to keep humour alive.

Live joyfully. Be your own best friend, but be a friend to others too, and don’t be afraid to ask them to be friends for you. Even if you end up being the strong one, helping out, or giving advice when asked – you shouldn’t have to be an island – you deserve to have a happy band of people around to help you too.

You don’t need crutches to lean on once you start this journey properly. You don’t ever need to hide or play games either – you can look the world right in the eye, be honest with yourself as well as with everyone else.

As your patterns clarify into a true representation of who you are – life will recognise this and reflect your abundantly graceful way of BEING right back to you.

It is exhilarating to liberate yourself. You won’t be allowing yourself to be suppressed or limited any more. You won’t feel sapped of energy any more. You will become aligned with whatever holds real meaning for you. You will take care of yourself, not in a selfish way, but in a healthy way, in order to optimise your whole being – good nutrition, exercise, good breathing, positive thinking – because you are all the time learning more about yourself, and how to avoid negative spirals, and things you don’t want in your life.

You are the only one who can limit yourself, so just don’t allow it to happen.

Always expand your being, do what works best for you – breathe – expand your energy. Use the ideas in here for renewing and inspiring yourself (and I can offer you many more ideas if you want to take it further). Stretch yourself.

Don’t wait – start now. Welcome your new life in – stand tall. Open your heart and your eyes – you already have all that it takes – to be really alive. Shine on you crazy diamonds!

We have guides, and life coaching packs available for your own use at –

http://www.radiance-solutions.co.uk/essenceguides.htm

including how to use consciousness expanding tools such as meditation.

The life coaching packs include all 3 of my Achievable Goal Planning Sections in one bundle –

How to Maximise Success, Help to Decide, and all the FORMS to assist you.

Link to blog on Positive Mind and Body Talk (Intention II)

See my articles – An Holistic approach to Loving our Bodies and our Lives

and Respecting your Body and choosing sound relationships

 

2014awithtext

What a ride it’s gonna be!

x

How we can feel peaceful and empowered enough to deal with almost anything

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Peace comes from within. “Peace is Power!” Even when we know about all the ugly stuff that goes on in the world, Peace is Power is still the best response!

I understand that ’Namaste’ means something like ’the god in me recognises and/or honours the god within you’. The word God can mean whatever you believe it to mean, for me it is the conscious stream of life from which we all come, and to which we can stay connected throughout our lives as a source of peace, wisdom, love, support, knowing, inspiration, vitality, security, balance, and inner strength.

I think that awareness is paramount, because in awareness we gain understanding, which then enables us to regain our feeling of empowerment. We need to feel empowered to make our choices consciously, about how to deal with things in life, rather than reacting in fear (which tends to make us blind and weak).

If we are aware in such a way, we can be realistic yet positive, and we can properly focus our intentions. This will help us deal with pretty much any emotions, events, changes or plans.  It will even help us to deal with mental or physical health issues

Awareness can be quite sensual (which can add to your sense of feeling empowered). Think about how your body moves as you live your life, how amazing it is; think about nature, observe the intricate beautiful details of natural things, and of things we create (including tapestries & garments, pottery, art, poetry & stories, music, dinners & other meals, woodwork & metalwork, buildings, inventions, plantations & gardens, etc). Breathe deeply to soak it all in and feel great.

Focus on the taste of food, the feel of textures in cloth, the feel of your partner’s hand in yours; smell the sea breeze, listen to the wind in the trees, witness the colours of the leaves, the children playing; the kind gestures of family & friends, and be thankful for this life we are experiencing – this life we can all help to keep wonderful.

Feel the wonder of being alive flood into you anytime you want, by taking a deep breath and letting the experience of these things fill you up.  You can give yourself a great boost by doing this anytime you want, even just by remembering the details.

We all have that same stream of life within us, so you are a part of everything.  Each one of us has the power to make a difference to everything.  Breathe in that vital connection to the life source and sensual beauty everywhere.  Feel loved and strong enough, and you will have the confidence to deal with pretty much anything.

Julia Woodman – Radiance-Solutions –
Life Coaching, Counselling, and Personal Development –
Help, support & advice available by phone and email

Life Coaching can help you plan the details of what you want to do and how to achieve these goals.
My service has also helped people decide what it is they actually might want to do.

Counselling can help you sort out any issues that might be getting in your way.

I also have many more personal development tips and tools available to help support you
They will offer you inspiration, and add to your sense of security, balance, and wellbeing.
They will boost your awareness and help you focus your intentions towards fulfilment.
However, the above idea, if used regularly, will help you well on your way to being able to
face anything.