Cherishing

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What do you really want of me?  Some people seem to think they need to fulfil certain criteria for their partners, but really the answer is “I want you to just be you – the one I love.”

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We don’t need to make decisions about our own lives based on what we think others want.  Even if we think we know what they want, we are probably wrong!

Yes, obviously you do make decisions together about things that affect the workings of your life – logistic things – like when to have supper and what you might like to have, how to approach getting DIY tasks done, where to meet after work.

And these things certainly apply to jobs – how to work as a team to meet the objectives.

But they don’t apply to your personal choices about who you are being deep down, what you are interested in, how you behave in the world, what your lessons in life might be, what you want to learn, and do.
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No one person should be influencing another to be other than themselves – this is not really love – unless they simply do not understand the implications of what they are doing, and would be willing to try to understand this in order to consider doing things differently.  (Note that I said “consider” – if they do not wish to give you the freedom to be yourself even when they do understand the implications then this shows that they do not truly cherish you for who you really are, and may prefer to control you, or try to make you into someone to fit their needs.)

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We should not have expectations of others, other than to be themselves, and try to make reasonable efforts to get on with each other and with things that need doing so that you can function as a couple or team.  These things merely require the willingness to: communicate, compromise to reach joint decisions about practical things, and to actually get on and do your share.  They have nothing whatsoever to do with trying to control or change who a person is.

If you want to try to change another to fit your needs, then you should look at why you think you have such needs.  The idea of love is simply to give love and be loved in return.  You love just as you are and just as they are, otherwise it is not love in the first place – it is merely some idea that you quite like someone and if you can just mould them to fit your needs they will do – but this can never work, not even if you are desperate!

We also have to understand that people are affected by circumstance, and make allowances for this – they may grow past it or not, but that does not mean we love them any more or less.  Hopefully pure love will get you both through, but it is difficult if you don’t communicate.  You have to not be afraid of talking – trust that the other will want to listen and at least try to understand.  But it is not our job to try to ‘fix’ another, just to be there for each other.  So as long as you can communicate enough to share your love, so that you do have some joy in your life together, you should be fine.

Perhaps part of cherishing is also being grateful for what you do have.  Try to remember all the good things if you are in any doubt.

We should look at the good things in life in general as well, in order to cherish life itself.

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Come visit our CHERISH board on Pinterest at https://www.pinterest.com/woodmanjulia/cherish/

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xx namaste

Between one illusion and another

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Poem / Philosophical breakthrough following painful events / New direction ……

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I love you all – but what’s the point –
We can’t change anything –
We are who we are –
So let’s let go of this old fantasy –

After all – if it’s only a game
We play here – nothing matters –
Who we are, what we do –
It’s only a choice of character

And role – we can re-write the script,
Yeah sure – do whatever fits
In each moment we play –
So long as you don’t throw yourself away

For you are the fundamental actor
Behind the stories and scenes
You so consistently deliver
To tease your body and mind.

It’s fine, we could play for all time
And not cover every imaginable insight,
for the possibilities are infinite,
so you might as well laugh, and try

to enjoy the ride you’ve got
until you stop and climb on another one.
You are the one who puts all the pieces in place
So that you can trip out again and again

Until one day you return
To the original script-writing room
To review and learn what you might have missed
Before you come back for more adventures –

So you may as well grab the chance
To get quite a few themes in
While you’re here this time anyway,
Gets a heads-up on your creative skills –

You might as well turn
Your hand to as many things
As you can, just to see
What might happen –

Just to feel what it’s like
To be in for each particular ride.
Whether you end up laughing or crying –
Remember it’s just like a movie.

Don’t get sucked in to the terrible pain,
Just move on to your next creation,
And don’t fear the many alternative endings,
Just create your own next act, scene, stage –

Who knows, it could even be delicious
If you start to get a handle on this
World of interacting holographic multi-
Sensory things you keep on dreaming up.

There is power in knowing
That it doesn’t matter that it doesn’t matter.
Life is not serious – it’s a hoot!
I’m off to make fantasies of a different nature,

A series of illusions within an illusion
In which one thing will always be clear –
Each will seem very real,
But will be shattered and rebuilt into another –

Just to illustrate the point,
And to have fun while doing so,
Of course, otherwise there would be no
point. Wanna play?

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On NOT being a guru

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i.m.h.o.

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I don’t believe anyone should set themselves up as some sort of guru – but I do think one should be one’s OWN guru.

You can use higher levels of consciousness to question your own thoughts and actions.  Use your mind, heart, body, and soul in partnership – to be true to one’s self, to learn about our existence and our wonderful planet, and to grow ever wiser – yet always question one’s own wisdom with humility, recognizing that we can never know things for sure – it’s all opinion, perspective, emotional filtering – depending on one’s own past experiences etc.  Yet we can reduce that filtering effect by letting go of past programs to see things more clearly and lovingly, more openly (non-judgementally), and to respond objectively rather than being sucked into a subjective reaction.  There are many tools we can use to help us progress or simply to remind us of what we already know we should be doing.

I don’t think people should shut themselves off from the world either, except perhaps for short periods, if one is going to focus on learning to meditate or to study the wilds by immersing themselves totally in a part of nature for a while.  But sooner or later we must bring back what we have learned and apply it to living in the day-to-day world successfully.  Everything can be integrated into a wholesome, balanced way of living – at peace with both the inner (one’s core self) and the outer (everything around you).

We can be in constant contact with Sublime One-ness in everyday life!

I do not wish to focus on the idea of “helping” or seeking to “help” either.  I merely want to share what I have learnt, experienced, created, etc, so that anyone who may choose to access it may do so.  I do think I have good stuff to offer because I have really spent a lot of time learning and practising things, and can save people time on their own journeys and offer useful tips and guidance along the way; but I share with humility, always remembering that everything I say or write is only “in my humble opinion”, and acknowledging that I am ALWAYS still learning.

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Leo quotes / tweets

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#leo #quote as a kitten just love to #play and explore with endless #curiosity

#leo #quote as a cat i love to lie in #sun & still #explore & #play but a little more #seriously playing at #life my way

#leo #quote as #lion i will #roar if stood upon or not given a say – #free #expression & #sharing of mature #cat findings

#leo #quotes cat poem in julia woodman video … with Africa & yachting poems + economic & political satire + nature

#leo #quote – leo walks quietly seeking out #life but can get on a rock and #roar when it’s called for, or just to express joy

#leo #quote may look like a pussycat but ain’t no #pussycat

#leo #quote kitten games come naturally coz #life is fun, #philosophy coz life’s intriguing, #creativity to celebrate all

#leo #quote what’s #cute, don’t do cute, i’m a leo

All above by julia woodman –

See my twitter account for many more leo quotes / tweets by others

https://twitter.com/WoodmanJulia

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